Pregnancy Survey

I haven't been the best at documenting my pregnancy, so here are a few questions I'm frequently asked...


How far along? 37 weeks (as of 10/4/13)

Do you have any stretch marks? None. I’m giving all credit to this. I started using it daily, as soon as I found out I was pregnant. It’s a bit pricey, but it lasts a long time. I’m only on my second jar and still have plenty left (way more than I need to get me through these 3 weeks). I say $80 to prevent stretch marks is a great deal!!! I would recommend it to everyone, and I will not do pregnancy without it!!!

 
Are you sleeping ok? love sleep, pregnant or not. The quality of sleep has sort of diminished as of late, but it’s ok. I usually have to get up 3-4 times to pee, but I can’t complain, as I’ve heard of people getting up 7+ times during the night. Sometimes, I have a hard time falling back to sleep (we’re talking, like, it has taken 3 hours to get back to sleep). When I take Benadryl before bed, I can always fall right back to sleep.

Is there anything that you can't have that you miss? beer, wine, sushi. Luckily, I don’t have gestational diabetes (I failed my first test, but passed the 3-hr test). If I did, I’m sure I’d be missing all carbs!

Have you had any weird cravings (I get this question the most)? nope. Everyone always asks if I’ve had any weird cravings, and I feel like such a party-pooper when I say that I haven’t had any. Oh, wait…there was that one time I wanted cereal. We didn’t have any at home (we never eat it), so I actually drove to the store to get some. I guess that would count as a craving!

Does anything make you nauseous? nope. Never had any morning sickness, taste aversions, or heightened sense of smell. I feel so lucky and blessed!

Have you been very emotional? hmm…looking back, I think I definitely had some crazy moments (poor Brian--bless him for putting up with me), especially in the first trimester, but overall, I feel the same as I did before I was pregnant. Lots of people warned me that I would cry at the weirdest moments, but that has not been the case. My favorite has been, "oh, just wait until you start crying while watching the tv commercial about a kid eating cheerios." Yeah, no. Haven't had any of those crying moments. I'm not judging you, if you have, though. Everyone is different, and pregnancy hormones make everyone do different things!

When did you start showing? Oh, I’m showing alright (finally). I didn’t start showing until about 23 weeks…the in-between stage was so awkward. I just looked really constipated until then.

Are you still able to work out? yep, still working out. I don’t really feel different, so I’m just doing what I can, while I can. I know I won’t be able to work out for a couple of weeks after she’s born, so I’m trying to get it in now! I’m not running like I was before I was pregnant, but that’s just because the pounding makes me feel like I need to pee every 5 seconds. I’m just cycling, going to body pump, and going on long walks with the dogs.

Have you had any contractions? nope. No contractions. Only dilated 1 cm (as of my appt 10/3). I think Emerson is going to take her sweet little time.

Is your belly button in or out? In, but it’s weird. It looks as if it’s closing in!

Are you still able to wear your wedding rings? yep. They still fit like they did before!

Have you started nesting? perhaps...I'm not sure if it's nesting, or the fact that I finally have time to tackle a bunch of nursery projects now that work has slowed down, but, whatever it is, things are coming together nicely!

What are you most excited about? meeting my sweet girl! duh. Oh, and seeing Brian as a dad. He is already the best, and Little E already has him wrapped around her tiny little finger!

Are we ready to be parents?

This blog has the perfect test...I've copied it below. Sounds exciting.

Test 1: Preparation

Women: To prepare for pregnancy

1. Put on a dressing gown and stick a beanbag down the front.
2. Leave it there.
3. After 9 months remove 5% of the beans.

Men: To prepare for children

1. Go to a local chemist, tip the contents of your wallet onto the counter and tell the pharmacist to help himself
2. Go to the supermarket. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home. Pick up the newspaper and read it for the last time.

Test 2: Knowledge

Find a couple who are already parents and berate them about their methods of discipline, lack of patience, appallingly low tolerance levels and how they have allowed their children to run wild.
Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's sleeping habits, toilet training, table manners and overall behavior.
Enjoy it. It will be the last time in your life that you will have all the answers.

Test 3: Nights

To discover how the nights will feel:

You can kiss goodbye to precious beauty sleep as soon as you have a child

1. Walk around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 4 - 6kg, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.
2.  At 10pm, put the bag down, set the alarm for midnight and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 11pm and walk the bag around the living room until 1am.
4. Set the alarm for 3am.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and make a cup of tea.
6. Go to bed at 2.45am.
7. Get up again at 3am when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs in the dark until 4am.
9. Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up when it goes off.
10. Make breakfast.
Keep this up for 5 years. LOOK CHEERFUL

Test 4: Dressing Small Children 
1. Buy a live octopus and a string bag.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the string bag so that no arms hangout.
Time Allowed: 5 minutes.

Test 5: Cars

1. Forget the BMW. Buy a practical 5-door wagon.
2. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
3. Get a coin. Insert it into the CD player.
4. Take a box of chocolate biscuits; mash them into the back seat.
5. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.


Test 6: Going for a walk

The hilarious blog post details a new parent test for broody mothers

a. Wait.
b. Go out the front door.
c. Come back in again.
d. Go out.
e. Come back in again.
f. Go out again.
g. Walk down the front path.
h. Walk back up it.
i. Walk down it again.
j. Walk very slowly down the road for five minutes.
k. Stop, inspect minutely and ask at least 6 questions about every piece of used chewing gum, dirty tissue and dead insect along the way.
l. Retrace your steps.
m. Scream that you have had as much as you can stand until the neighbours come out and stare at you.
n. Give up and go back into the house.
You are now just about ready to try taking a small child for a walk.

 Test 7: Conversations with children
Repeat everything you say at least 5 times.

Test 8: Grocery Shopping
1. Go to the local supermarket. Take with you the nearest thing you can find to a pre-school child - a fully grown goat is excellent. If you intend to have more than one child, take more than one goat.
2. Buy your weekly groceries without letting the goat(s) out of your sight.
3. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.
Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Test 9: Feeding a 1 year-old 
1. Hollow out a melon
2. Make a small hole in the side
3. Suspend the melon from the ceiling and swing it side to side
4. Now get a bowl of soggy cornflakes and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon while pretending to be an aeroplane.
5. Continue until half the cornflakes are gone.
6. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot of it falls on the floor.

Test 10:TV
1. Learn the names of every character from the Wiggles, Barney, Teletubbies and Disney.
2. Watch nothing else on television for at least 5 years.

Test 11:  Mess
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out:

Are you up to the challenge of parenthood asks this hilarious blog post

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains
2. Hide a fish behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flowerbeds and then rub them on clean walls. Cover the stains with crayon. How does that look?
4. Empty every drawer/cupboard/storage box in your house onto the floor and proceed with step 5.
5. Drag randomly items from one room to another room and leave them there.

Test 12: Long Trips with Toddlers
1. Make a recording of someone shouting 'Mummy' repeatedly. Important Notes: No more than a 4 second delay between each Mummy. Include occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet.
2. Play this tape in your car, everywhere you go for the next 4 years.
You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Test 13:Conversations
1. Start talking to an adult of your choice.
2. Have someone else continually tug on your shirt hem or shirt sleeve while playing the Mummy tape listed above.
You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

Test 14: Getting ready for work
1. Pick a day on which you have an important meeting.
2. Put on your finest work attire.
3. Take a cup of cream and put 1 cup of lemon juice in it
4. Stir
5. Dump half of it on your nice silk shirt
6. Saturate a towel with the other half of the mixture
7. Attempt to clean your shirt with the same saturated towel
8. Do not change (you have no time).
9. Go directly to work
You are now ready to have children. ENJOY!!